Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. -Colossians 4:6

Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. -1Peter3:4

and of course,

Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised. -Proverbs31:30

of which i prefer the NIV version

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. -Proverbs31:30

so over the past few days, ive got to thinking about what it means to cultivate a spirit of grace. how do you bring these lessons into your daily life? definitely does not mean that women are weaker, or are to be useless and meek. how do you cultivate a spirit that is precious in the sight of the Lord, without diminishing your 'authority' in this world? people often view a submissive spirit as weak, and they interpret this to mean they can step all over you, which is.. not a very nice feeling i must say. i talked to auntie about this once, and she said a 'gentle and quiet spirit' doesnt mean you have to be silent and subservient and never speak, but its more the inward beauty that the Lord sees, the heart and the spirit, slow to anger, virtuous etc etc. wooboy man, long way to go.

had a 2hr long skype conversation with cherie yesterday, and we got to talking about people who live double lives. you know, inconsistency in the way you are in church and the way you are in school/work/play etc. i must say consistency and being true to who you are is not an easy thing to do, but i do believe that your values and your principles should not change depending on the kind of environment you are in. and i think this is manifestly seen in the words you use and the way you conduct yourself in different settings. like, you may be perfect in church every sunday. but just cos on monday youre stuck in an adversarial, competitive work environment does not make it right for you to be ruthless, condescending, evil and do whatever it takes to climb the corporate ladder. so how do you reconcile this? the reality of this hypocrisy never struck me until one youth conference (i think) when i heard the song 'wholehearted', which goes something like this

Lord, i want You to know
that this double life is through
and everything, all of me,
im giving to You
and with my whole heart
im gonna love You
and with my whole life
im gonna live it for You
take my heart, every secret part
im wholehearted in love with You.

i think it requires a conviction from the Lord that completely transforms who you are.
and that makes me think of another song! empower me. haha
and only You have the power to change me, to what i was born to be
Jesus break through all my defences, empower me.
and so i have come to the conclusion that being a woman after God's own heart is something that will take years to cultivate
but the transformation of your life begins from the moment you say "I do", to God.

He who began a good work in you
will be faithful to complete it. (:
so those are just my the jumbled thoughts that came from studying public law (ahahahah. spiritual inspiration comes from everywhere. hurhur)