my head is just swimming with thoughts now i dont know where to begin. well the basis of all these thoughts is just from reflection i did on the way home from church today after the uni gathering which, i must say was a great blessing to my heart (:

haha my thoughts first from the songs i was listening to on the way home

upon a prayer,
i'll even dare to face my fears
step by step my selfishness He's breaking.
i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me,
yes, i will be stirred but not shaken.
yes, i will be stirred but not shaken. [stirred not shaken - deb fung]

the words of this song struck me partly because of the circumstances i seem to be finding myself in recent times and also cos of the msg kenneth gave us during the dinner from daniel1:8 about how he purposed in his heart not to defile himself with a portion of the king's delicacies. he encouraged us to hold fast to our faith as we enter the university and i think thats one challenge im really going to have to pray for strength to face up to. im scared of the influences i know will be very real when school starts, peer pressure is going to be real and very much in my face cos im already feeling it now, and only by His strength am i going to have the faith and strength to make decisions that will honor Him (: so please pray for me!

one way, Jesus, You're the only One that i could live for
one way, Jesus, You're the only One that i could live for!
You are the way, the truth and the life
we live by faith and not by sight for You-
we're living all for you. [one way - hillsongs]

haha actually it was the first line of the chorus that struck me the most 'one way, Jesus, You're the ONLY ONE that i could live for.' haha i was on the way home walking through one of the dark ulu places so i was happily singing to myself with reckless abandon and i felt so happy! haha cos this is the kind of song you need to shout out and sing cos He's the way, the truth and the life (:

haha a second notsorelevant thought struck me because i remembered a couple i saw at gelare when i was out the other day heh. it was so strange cos they were staring at each other with the ohmygoodnessyourethemostbeautifulthingiveeverseen eyes and taking photos with each other and OF each other like nobody's business. heh and i found that particularly hilarious because they were doing that right in the middle of a public area and felt no embarassment whatsoever. haha im not planning to do such strange things when i have a boyfriend [if i ever] heh but i thought if i could just learn to focus on the Lord as the only One i could ever live for and just remember that He is the centre around which all my world revolves and look at Him and stand in awe of Who He is and the value of His Word, my life would be so much easier to live. i want to knock myself! cos i never ever consciously practise this principle in my life even though i know it all too well.

but this time i will remember- before i start school i will purpose in my heart. i will remember to set non-negotiables to ensure that the choices i make are always to the praise of His glory, and let this four years be the beginning of exponential growth in faith and love for the Lord (:

haha i will continue the rest of my thoughts someday or sometime when im free, its 12 and my parents are sleeping and im typing in the dark with a tiny study light. -but that reminds me, light that shines in a dark place! to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world (: