hahah im in a very joyful/thankful mood cos ive learnt a very important lesson on trust and patience in the course of a day! hahah not that ive fully learnt it [i never will] but well. its a good improvement ;)

the day ALREADY started off bad cos i had to drag myself out of bed at sixthirty to get to school to attempt to have some inkling of how to do a citation before lawr at ten. and when i got there and tried to nap for awhile, i kept having badbad dreams and then after i got up, someone came and switched off the light at MY CORNER of the study room and didnt switch it on again -___- and then someone said something not very nice to me. and that was the ultimate oooohhh i was prettyy pissed off cos in the first place i didnt see anything i did that warranted such a mean response. i kept praying in my head and asking for alotalotalot of self-control to not suffer from a case of verbal diarrhoea and proclaim all the notsonice facts about that person. and basically the evil one was egging me on in my head [hahah i can just imagine the angel and devil thing]

one part of me said: go suffer from a case of verbal diarrhoea, it is COMPLETELY called for. and nothing of what you say is gonna be a lie anyway. everything is the TRUTH. they are FACTS. the absolute truth and nothing but the truth.

another part of me said: NO. remember what the Bible says. a tooth for a tooth and an eye for an eye DOES NOT APPLY in this case. in this case its the when-someone-slaps-you-on-one-cheek-turn-the-other-cheek-for-him/her-to-slap case. and why does it really matter anyway? the whole point is to be blameless in the sight of the Lord and look within yourself. did you do something that could have contributed to that comment being made? [CONTRIBUTORY NEGLIGENCE AHAHAHAH] learn patience. learn to love. what would He do? what would He want YOU to do.

and as i talked to God, this debate was going on furiously in my head. i had to take manymanymanymanymany breaths to calm myself down. and it was particularly hard cos. when your respect for someone is pretty much non-existant its just. exceptionally hard to take mean responses and you just feel like throwing everything back at the person like hellooooooooooo you-are-like-that-what-gives-you-a-right-to-talk-about-me. haha. PSALM119:161

"princes persecute me without a cause, but my heart stands in awe of Your Word."

when i was pondering alonggg and hard over my rewrite of the closed memo [haha.] i listened to 'the gift' by Jim Brickman. and one line of the song caught my attention 'im thankful everyday, for the gift.'

im thankful everyday, for the gift. and i was greatly rebuked by that line. i tend to forget, how blessed i am. the most important gift of all was given 2000 years ago on a cross. and when i accepted the promise that came along with it, the promise of eternal life and salvation in the Lord i also was promised a whole load of benefits like a joy-filled life! and apple-red happiness, popcorn cheerfulness, cinammon singin' inside! peppermint energy, gum-drop holidays when you give Christ your life! hhah im MAD. and on the way back from driving i was in a hurrrrrr really go-and-slap-yourself-for-even-feeling-remotely-pissed-off mode. haha. on the brighter side, i have an 'inspiring' story [-_______-] to share with my ypg kids about one lesson ive learnt and applied to my life this week. ;)

haha. and another thing im thankful for is friends ;) haah. i have good support in school. haha maybe i havent found superrrrrrr good friends in school but they're all sweet enough to listen to my whining and look after me when im in a HMPF-mood. haha and SO i shall stop now and attempt to redo my closed memo with the newfound knowledge bewstowed on me by smart students who got A for their closed memos. RULE SYSTHESIS. PLEASE SAVE ME. haha

if you look around and see some joys have passed you by,
dont give up- just get up and live.
and if you ever sigh over things you wished you'd tried
now's the time- to get up and live.
dont set your heart on things you have missed
but look out to the horizon, and get up and live

one day, one day, one day at a time.
one day, one day at a time.
one day, one day, living one day at a time.
one day, one day at a time.

and if your past romances left behind
start to love yourself- and get up and live
and if some painful memory keeps you hiding from tomorrow
take a second chance- to get up and live.
dont let your sorrow scald you,
dont live in the past
and dont let your failures hold you- just get up and live.

one day, one day, one day at a time.
one day, one day at a time.
one day, one day, living one day at a time.
one day, one day at a time.

if you had a dream, what you might've been
dont let go- just get up and live
and if you think the years turn too quickly through life's pages
take whats left- and get up and live
dont mourn the years that have drifted, and what might've been
take all that you've been given- and get up and live

i will remember! get up and live (: