okayyyyyyy i am finally online. grrrr school and terms are so disgusting cos it drives you mad rargh/. been sick the past few days too my throat seriously feels like its being stabbed from all directions by evil germs with pin-like swords and oh man OUCH and my poor nose..thats the result of being stupid and eating sting ray with chili when you already have a sore throat. badbadbadbadbad and i spent the last few days feeling headachey and sleeping alot! and i am dead for terms grr

but its OK haha i am learning to be thankful amidst all these disastrous circumstances andddddd not get angry when people think i skipped school when im SUFFERING AT HOME -kicks- and even though its very trying to study inflation or do integration when the bed seems so welcoming i am still trying..and really this morning's qt was justjustjust amazing. i think i havent really taken sufficient time off to read His Word and wait upon Him for the past like few weeks, i've forgotten how much joy and satisfaction it brings in just sitting there alone and abosorbing whatever He tells me like a sponge- and THEN when im fullyfilled, entering the day just doesnt seem so dreadful anymore. (:

this morning i went back to day1 of the purpose-driven life [cos i finished all 40days yaye! :D] and looking up the references and really absorbing the essence of what His Word can give to me was refreshing and an amazing new experience and REMINDER that He really is IN CONTROL. job12:10 "for He holds the life of all living things and the breath of all mankind." and for a moment there i just paused and thought about what it meant for Him to hold in His very hands the BREATH of ALL MANKIND. and thats too big a truth and too big of a wonder for me, for any of us to fathom, and i just thought. nothing else matters, really it doesnt- nothing else matters cos He is EVERYTHING. He should be my everything. and im ashamed to say that im far from being able to say that He IS my everything. cos the things of the world often draw away my focus from Him and take me away from what i should be doing everyday of my life- worshipping the Lord in everything that i do. and thats a thought that i really appreciated from the purpose driven life in the later days, that worship is not singing, not the 'thing' you do before you receive the message of God's Word from the pastor- its EVERY SINGLE ASPECT of your life. everything you say, everything you do, should always be an act of worship that will bring glory to Him in every way. and it's tough, really it is, but there is always strength and joy in His Word. rivers of living water! and i remember what it says in 1john5:3- His commandments are NOT burdensome. and thats exactly the way the horrible, disgusting, incidious evil one attacks us cos he makes use of our sinful nature to pull us towards what we are inclined to do- and psycho us to do it. but haha yaye my ephesians verses again eph6:10-20 to learn to put on and fight with the full armour of God and to never, ever ever ever give up.

"for to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is LIFE and PEACE." -romans8:6

everything means nothing- if i ain't got You!

terms are in TWO days. i must quit being headachey and keep on keep on studying cos theres no other wayyyyyyyyy and i will try [veryvery hard by His strength :S] to do it well for His glory.

beautiful, beautiful, Jesus is beautiful. and Jesus makes beautiful, things of my life. carefully, touching me, causing my eyes to see- Jesus makes beautiful things of my life. (: