found out choir rehearsals are on saturday afternoon every week now and though im really sad/disappointed that i dont get to go for ypg, i know the Lord is trying to teach me something through it so im just gonna learn to trust. and remember that in all i do i do it for Him, and it all i do i must find joy cos thats how He meant for us to be- abiding in the light and in joy! (:

and im really learning to appreciate my special friends and the older ones sososososo much more. the AMAZING amount of support i've received is just..unbelievable. and all the encouragement brings such an uplift to the spirit and its like just WOW

i think back on the past year on how i've fallen and how He's brought me back time and time again and im just. awe-struck. i still remember screaming like mad when chloe called me to tell me i got into the choir and i mustmust remember that He's placed me here for a reason and i know its through this channel that i can learn to sing, well better for Him and be able to reach those around me (: in much prayer for a few people and when i look at their lives firstly i thank the Lord that He took me from there and secondly i pray so hard that they may find that same, amazing sense of joy, rest and peace that i have found in Him (:

school's getting really tiring and all with all its burdensome problems, but in the midst of it i just cant help but feel His goodness and just.. smile. i've learnt that joy is not mad jumping around and craziness heh thats just HIGH but that quiet, peaceful, LASTING joy is just as, if not more precious than exuberant joy (: and thats what i've found and learnt this week!

the first week of school was really tough getting up at 5.40am is just reallyreally daunting and hard. but even though i almost half fell asleep i just kept at it and told the Lord i really want to follow after Him, i really want to find the physical and spiritual strength to live my life in the most dynamic way possible that would enable me to live the best through Him. and after sleepy monday, sleepy tuesday, sleepy wednesday..there came IAMSOAWAKEICOULDDOMASSPENOWANDNOTDIE alertness on thursday, and the exact, exact same thing this morning. and i was like. WOW. its just amazing what the Lord can do if you just dont give up asking, seeking and knocking. haha jia was telling us how her body alarm wakes her up at 5am without her wanting to wake up and spending that hour with the Lord just gives her the strength for the whole day and i was like EVENMOREWOW! ok so jia is officially my inspiration now to get up at 5.40am without the alarm clock! haha k it takes time but anyway (: its baby steps now spending half an hour each morning and over time shifting the timing by five mins earlier each time till one day i reach one hour! haha k but i reallyreally am thankful for the amazing measure of strength He's granted me (:

and yes getting things off my chest is a good thing.. and im just thankful for His people (: new verse of meditation- 2cor5:20! ambassadors for Christ- on and off King soil :D

oh man really praying much learning to control myself when oooohhh i just feel like smacking someone but renewed very much from the moment i set foot into His house this morning (: its just a wonderful feeling just being given the privilege to worship and to sing praises to Him at a place i know is home (:

knowing You

All i once held dear, built my life upon.
All the world reveres and wars to own.
All i once thought gain i have counted loss
Spent and worthless now, compared to this.

knowing You, Jesus, knowing You.
there is no greater thing.
You're my all, You're the best,
You're my joy my righteousness, and i love You Lord.

Now my heart's desire is to know You more,
to be found in You, and known as Yours.
To possess by faith what I could not earn,
all surpassing gift of righteousness.

knowing You, Jesus, knowing You.
there is no greater thing.
You're my all, You're the best,
You're my joy my righteousness, and i love You Lord.

Oh, to know the pow'r of Your risen life and to know You in Your sufferings.
To become like You in Your death, my Lord,
so with You to Live and never die.

knowing You, Jesus, knowing You.
there is no greater thing.
You're my all, You're the best,
You're my joy my righteousness, and i love You Lord.

this is my new favorite hymn! the lyrics are just beautiful and wow so nice :D a new week a new challenge and i have my first point down for my graph of faith! haha hopefully ir'll be on an upward climb all year (: yes i can be strong! phil4:13 through CHRIST (:

man my arms are aching from playing squash heh i beat my brother at ONE game out of four.. but not bad since its the first time i've touched a squash racquet haha but yupyup must persevere and wake up early every morning to proclaim His goodness and walk, just as He would have us walk (:

yaye memorised eph6:10-17 haha three more verses to go but the imagery of the armour of God is just.. awe-inspiring. and i want to wield the sword of the Spirit the best way i know how.. but first i have to start small. and i will be thankful for each and every thing that comes my way! i will learn to be strong (:

and alot of nagging doubts at the back of my mind wondering if i can be strong and overcome the temptations that i face and I KNOW THE ANSWER IS YES get thee behind me satan! grr haha ok im mad already but really seeking to bring the words of this hymn into the week with me that truly, knowing Him there is no greater thing (:

jer9:23-24 let me glory only in that i know Him (:

"this i recall to my mind,
therefore i have HOPE.

through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed,
because His compassions fail not.
they are new every morning,
great is Your faithfulness.

'the Lord is my portion' says my soul,
'therefore i HOPE in Him.'"

lamentations3:21-24

really really like this passage and its just wonderful recalling it in the middle of the day when the going gets tough and im reminded that i have this unfailing lifeline to cling on to and that He will never let go of me. what i like about the passage is that it says 'i have hope' and 'i hope in Him' not 'i WILL have hope' and 'i WILL hope in Him' but for me its so special that its such a definite statement that I HOPE IN HIM and that theres just no two ways about it (:

im still sleepy in the morning! and i always feel sleepy during phys lec but im trying veryvery hard and remembering what i promised and i can do all things through CHRIST who gives me strength. let my life be the praise! and i will be strong..

change my heart o God, make it ever true. change my heart o God,

may i be like You.

man i hate chasing for homework cos everyone finds me annoying when i do that and even i find myself annoying! as if im not naggy enough :'( shucks and i have to compile the entire econs thing by wednesday shucks breatheeeee really gotta trust Him on this one, the first day of school and so much crap -faint

first real challenge this morning: WAKING UP. im such a pig i sleep like theres no tmr and i literally dragged myself out of bed when the alarm clock rang, forcing myself to bear in mind what kenneth said about the mornings being the best time for qt and yup! spent some time meditating on the psalms and on john10 about the Lord being the door of the sheep and the good shepherd (: and though i really was kinda sleepy, i think i would've been worse if i hadnt spent that time with Him so (:

we [rie jolene ben sherman anthony sam me] were supposed to meet outside the gate to step in together to yaye remind ourselves that we're gonna walk with each other all the way over the next year but everyone was late! ben and sam were SUPREMELY late haha but its ok bearing with one another in LOVE..and anw in the end all the guys thought rie and i were crazy and being stupid so we were the only two that went "one two three STEP!" and stepped in together whilst the rest of them strolled behind -_- thank you for making us look like idiots heh but JOYFUL idiots nonetheless (:

and im really learning the importance of abiding in His ways and walking with Him, not only that but im also being reminded about it over and over again because in every single lecture and tutorial period today we were reminded that this year is really crucial and etc..and i know that just like my o level year i would die and burn out if i didnt have Him. but thats one of the traps i dont want to fall into: just relying on Him cos i know i'd 'die' without Him, but my prayer for this year is that i reallyreally learn what it means to abide in the light, to seek after Him and follow with all that is in me. to take up my cross and follow Him (:

and i refuse to start going mad on the first day of school. i just attempted to clean up my room which really, REALLY is messy and i got so annoyed with the mess! and the irritation was like whoa rising like crazy until i just dropped everything and went to read the psalms..and He really gave me peace (: haha i know it sounds stupid but i really get annoyed when my room is messy cos i know i gotta clean it up some day heh and yea the psalms brought a tremendous sense of comfort and renewed joy to my heart so (: and memorising the Lord's Word brings a muchmuch greater sense of revival and joy- rivers of living water (: over the past two or three weeks i've done psalm3:3, psalm5:12, psalm9:13, psalm28:7, psalm27:6, jer9:23-24, john10:7 and john10:9 haha im still in the midst of revision! but yea i love the psalms (:

im still far from being able to wield the sword of the Spirit [His Word] well and im also far from really loving and desiring His Word but over time, ask, seek and knock and i know He will reveal (:

alot of things on the back of my mind now that i've yet to place down but im not giving up im gonna keep seeking, keep trusting day by day.. and i know i will find the strength to carry on.

Lord of Heaven and earth (: